Body Language is a very important part of communication in all creatures throughout the world, human and otherwise. During the mating period many animals let the fact that they are interested (or not) in each other be known through body language. Most fights are also avoided through this method whenever there is rivalry in the group.
Same with humans - we too use this process of silent communication to get our point across; sexually, aggressively or even in plain communication. It is a well known and researched fact that men communicate with each other using body language, even more than woman do.
Personally, I think this skill developed over thousands of years with men trying to communicate while woman where talking between themselves in the same cave. This of course came a long time before men were allowed the sanctity of their garage, but by that time this skill was deep seated in men’s genetic makeup.
The problem is, however, that men and woman have two very different dialects as far as body language is concerned. One is very pronounced (male), filled with sound effects and large sweeping movements, while others (female) use a nice, discreet and almost impossible to decode dialect.
I have seen plenty a woman confused as hell after listening to a conversation between males. While men of course have little to no clue what was said between two women, seeing as they generally doze off between all the verbal details that is included in the discussions. However, the fact that women are verbal does not mean that they do not use the intricacies of body language between themselves, but almost never to get the point across.
The problem? We expect each other to understand our dialects. Let’s go to the bar and/or nightclub scenario. Can someone (anyone, I’m begging) tell me what: “Okay, we have been looking at each other for the last hour. I like you, so now would be a good time to come over and ask my name.” is in woman body language? Please? Pretty please with a cherry on top and chocolate sprinkles.
But then again - maybe you shouldn’t waste your time. I am so daft in that regard that even a woman saying: “Take me now” probably won’t get through (or has ever).
On the daft topic here is an amusing little anecdote. While I might be daft as far as the whole flirting and body language thing goes I am definitely not as daft as one of my buddies. Let me lay the scene.
The Doors (for those of you NOT in civilization; the Doors is an Alternate nightclub, actually THE alternate night club. Originally based in Marshal Street, Johannesburg, where this took place, till it moved to Edenvale.).
Anyway, there we all are on the dance floor having one of the greatest times of our lives, a very large quantity of alcohol and even more cigarettes under our belt (yes this was before our Minister of health got bored), when all of a sudden this bombshell rocks up in our group and starts dancing in front of my buddy. No less than three times did she raise her (considerably short) miniskirt for him to have a peek - and that is not even counting the way she was dancing.
Now this is not the way that I like my women - a little too forward for my liking - but the boots were good. But that is slightly beside the point. Little old daft me could see that the amount off effort needed there was even less than asking her name, and more along the lines of pointing the way to the car. My buddy on the other hand didn’t have a clue. Only after the fact, on the way home when we told him, he caught on ….. and you should have seen his face.
But back to the point after that distraction - all this miscommunication is really annoying. I am sure that there isn’t a single male or female (wild animal) that does not understand each other. So why the hell are we so different? I mean - if the entire point is to talk without talking should we not understand each other? I sure as hell think so.
Now you are probably asking why I decided to write this. Well it is actually quite simple. I am sick and tired of women trying to say things like: “You bastard! How could you forget our anniversary”, or “It’s my birthday today you dolt!” and not being able to understand it. I am sick of people telling me: “She likes you”, or “She was all over you”, when as far as I was concerned all it was, was a nice conversation.
Hell, to be honest all I really want is to be able to understand women full stop.
Same with humans - we too use this process of silent communication to get our point across; sexually, aggressively or even in plain communication. It is a well known and researched fact that men communicate with each other using body language, even more than woman do.
Personally, I think this skill developed over thousands of years with men trying to communicate while woman where talking between themselves in the same cave. This of course came a long time before men were allowed the sanctity of their garage, but by that time this skill was deep seated in men’s genetic makeup.
The problem is, however, that men and woman have two very different dialects as far as body language is concerned. One is very pronounced (male), filled with sound effects and large sweeping movements, while others (female) use a nice, discreet and almost impossible to decode dialect.
I have seen plenty a woman confused as hell after listening to a conversation between males. While men of course have little to no clue what was said between two women, seeing as they generally doze off between all the verbal details that is included in the discussions. However, the fact that women are verbal does not mean that they do not use the intricacies of body language between themselves, but almost never to get the point across.
The problem? We expect each other to understand our dialects. Let’s go to the bar and/or nightclub scenario. Can someone (anyone, I’m begging) tell me what: “Okay, we have been looking at each other for the last hour. I like you, so now would be a good time to come over and ask my name.” is in woman body language? Please? Pretty please with a cherry on top and chocolate sprinkles.
But then again - maybe you shouldn’t waste your time. I am so daft in that regard that even a woman saying: “Take me now” probably won’t get through (or has ever).
On the daft topic here is an amusing little anecdote. While I might be daft as far as the whole flirting and body language thing goes I am definitely not as daft as one of my buddies. Let me lay the scene.
The Doors (for those of you NOT in civilization; the Doors is an Alternate nightclub, actually THE alternate night club. Originally based in Marshal Street, Johannesburg, where this took place, till it moved to Edenvale.).
Anyway, there we all are on the dance floor having one of the greatest times of our lives, a very large quantity of alcohol and even more cigarettes under our belt (yes this was before our Minister of health got bored), when all of a sudden this bombshell rocks up in our group and starts dancing in front of my buddy. No less than three times did she raise her (considerably short) miniskirt for him to have a peek - and that is not even counting the way she was dancing.
Now this is not the way that I like my women - a little too forward for my liking - but the boots were good. But that is slightly beside the point. Little old daft me could see that the amount off effort needed there was even less than asking her name, and more along the lines of pointing the way to the car. My buddy on the other hand didn’t have a clue. Only after the fact, on the way home when we told him, he caught on ….. and you should have seen his face.
But back to the point after that distraction - all this miscommunication is really annoying. I am sure that there isn’t a single male or female (wild animal) that does not understand each other. So why the hell are we so different? I mean - if the entire point is to talk without talking should we not understand each other? I sure as hell think so.
Now you are probably asking why I decided to write this. Well it is actually quite simple. I am sick and tired of women trying to say things like: “You bastard! How could you forget our anniversary”, or “It’s my birthday today you dolt!” and not being able to understand it. I am sick of people telling me: “She likes you”, or “She was all over you”, when as far as I was concerned all it was, was a nice conversation.
Hell, to be honest all I really want is to be able to understand women full stop.
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